Many people find it difficult keeping New Year's Resolutions. As we are looking at the end of this year and looking behind us to see all that has happened, many people look at ways to better oneself in some way or another. Some want to lose weight, quit smoking, eat better, or other things that we deem as "healthy". Others want to better themselves by keeping a better attitude -- reducing stress, reducing anger, and so on. Others that are religious or spiritual in some way, wish to become more serious about whatever path they have chosen. But, why is it that such a HIGH percentage of people that make the resolutions cannot seem to keep them? Actually, the reason is very simple -- it's how we write the goals and define them. Often, people will make vague goals -- "I want to lose weight." But that doesn't say how someone will do that. It doesn't say how MUCH weight is being lost. Here's another -- "I want to eat better." What is that? Not defining a goal is almost a recipe for failure. So, first step -- DEFINE YOUR GOAL. Because it is a common one -- I am using losing weight as an example. This can of course be substituted for ANY goal that you want to achieve. Also, it never has to be only the New Year. We can make goals each day. In fact, we need to open to redefining things when a goal seems unattainable. It doesn't mean that we don't work harder. It means we just redefine things a little.
So -- Define the goal. More specifically, define the LONG TERM goal. Or, also known as, the final goal or the final outcome you want to achieve. Rather than being vague -- define actually what you want to do. To do this -- remember the following equation.
Goal = Behavior + Frequency/Intensity + Time
In other words, here is a good example -- I want to 50 pounds by the end of this year.
Another example -- I want to read 1 chapter in my Bible each day.
Or --- I want to quit smoking by March 31st.
OR -- I want to exercise 4 times a week for 45 minutes each session (or for 45 minutes total in a day - i.e. sessions can be broken up in a day for time reasons).
Remember -- Behavior (like lose weight) + Frequency/Intensity/Amount (like pounds) + Time (your deadline in a way or the "how often" this will happen)
Okay, got your goal? Let's move forward -- The next step is always the hardest -- what is your plan? In this you will have to create "in between" goals. It is hard for some people because we look at the enormity of our goal and figure "Nope -- no way I can finish that one. I messed up a couple times. I am just going to quit. Try again next year!!" In reality, we have a tendency to only make a single goal and we never bother to stop and offer ourselves a pat on the back. We forget to look at the progress we have made and ONLY look at how far we are from our final goal. So, what are good in between goals? Easy -- they are your stepping stones. Examples --
I will lose 2-3 pounds per week. (that is a healthy weight loss per week by the way).
I will cut my 2 pack a day cigarette habit down to 1 pack by the end of January. By the end of Feb., I will cut that in half into 1/2 a pack. By the end of March, I will be finished smoking.
I will start out reading a total of half a chapter every three days (or 1/3rd a chapter each day) for 4 weeks. After 4 weeks, I will increase to 1/2 a chapter a day (1 total chapter every other day). After another 4 weeks (2 months), I will read 2/3rds of a chapter each day (a little over 4 chapters in a week). After another 4 weeks, I will increase that to a whole chapter a day. (If you then want to go MORE than that -- go for it -- but remember -- don't increase too fast too soon or you WILL burn out).
That burn out rule applies to any goal. If I wanted to lose weight, and I made a goal to lose 10 pounds a week (very unhealthy and extremely hard), then after a week I will be frustrated and quit.
If I wanted to eventually read 3 chapters in my Bible a day, and I immediately started out with that (if I haven't had an already everyday reading habit in place), then I will quickly get mad at myself if I miss a single day of that.
The same can be said for ANYTHING. If you smoke and have EVER tried quitting cold turkey, you know how hard that is.
If you want to reduce a habit, then reduce it slowly and you have a higher chance of succeeding. If you want to increase something, then do it slowly. You will better have a chance of making it a habit for LIFE - not just a couple months.
Now -- define your plan a little better once you come up with good in between goals. Your number of in between goals WILL vary. Make sure they are attainable and they make sense. If they deal with your health, make sure they are healthy. If you have health problems, talk to a doctor. It is important not to put yourself in danger. So, make a plan for how you will do this.
I will lose weight by following (This is actually straight from a contingency plan I made up a while back)
§ Exercise will be done 6 days out of the week. MWF will be days for aerobic exercise for up to an hour including the following:
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