[FamilyofGod] MY LIFE.
HOLY SPIRIT,I FREE YOU TO TELL ANYONE THE TRUTH ABOUT ME IF I AM LYING OR NOT,THANKS MY FRIEND,LOVE YA'.It started when I was 4-5 years old.Was told by myself,{ I now know it was NOT me,something talking to me in my voice },that I was JESUS.{ I am NOT JESUS }Talking to myself.{ I know now I was talking to evil spirits.} I was hit by perverted spirits to.Wanting to wear girl clothes and not knowing why.I was not attracted to dudes at all,loved girls.I went from a smart,intelligent kid to something that COULD NOT learn or rememeber anything.Always alone,confused could not learn or remember anything {except evil}.I tried hard to study,it was like as soon as I learned it was wiped clean.I really never was friends with anybody,even til today.I knew ever since I was a little kid I was different,was never PART of any crowd or part of my family.Always felt I was being watched,by something when ever I was doing anything.The first time I had a vision I was in the 7th or 8th grade,saw something happen,then about 5 minutes later it happened.I seemed to always KNOW stuff.I HATED MY LIFE,I HATED GOD.Nothing ever made sense,I would learn something and immediatly it was GONE.I used to have alot of out of body experiances as a teenager.Always when I was reading,{ except once,later }.I did try to read the bible but it never made sense.I was drawn to the bible,it did not make sense.I always knew I would be a Preacher of the word but how if I HATED GOD ???? Why would GOD make me like this,a curse.What was I,who was I,something was wrong,this I knew since I was 4-5.I was given a strong body,not pretty or ugly,but VERY adaptable and agile,can take alot and keep going.The first couple of times I tried to have sex I would be ready and GONE,nothing,dead flesh.I HATED LIFE AND GOD.Did not like dudes,loved women so what was going on ??? Why have it then lose it for no reason.Started to go to younglife,then Church.Everything seemed like such a lie,I really tried,I went to church and church groups at least three times a week for over a year,saw ALOT of LIES.I remember saying TO MYSELF ???,I am saved now,this sucks.Started to really hate Christians.Started to do drugs,wanting to FEEL something,not to escape or hide,but to FEEL.Got into all kinds of trouble with the law,in and out of jail.Never wanted to work,but did want to work,{ only me and PAPA GOD understand that one }.Dreams started to happen about this time.Started to realize there was alot more going on than people knew or talked about.THIS WHOLE TIME,MY WHOLE LIFE I WAS UNDER INTENSE SPIRITUAL WARFARE AND I DID NOT KNOW IT,no one talked about this stuff,SO I THOUGHT MY LIFE WAS NORMAL,THAT THIS IS LIFE,ALL A LIE !!!!!!!!!!! The first time I was raped by a demon it was 2002-3.Woke up,bent over as something was behind me.NOT GOOD.VERY aware at this point that their was a world that was around me that most people could not see,hear or feel but I could.WAS NOT THE DRUGS,NO ONE in family history is mentaly unstable.Took a bath one day and as I walked by the living room a lady was on the couch looking at me,when I approaced her she disappered.Dreams started to really take off now.Once having a bad dream felt somone taping my shoulder to wake me up,to save me from the dream,turned around and it was her,she dissappeared.I once woke up with my hand in the air and she was holding it,then she dissappeared.Started to call her my lady friend.Started to talk to her.One day something male said somethings to me that was not good.A couple of days later I got drunk and mad and challenged it.I proceeded to get the crap kicked out of me in the natural and Spiritual world for a couple of months.I said sorry and it stopped,{ SO I THOUGHT }.I have seen that dude/demon at least three times.Once,it was looking at some stuff I used to paint and disappeared when I addressed him and approached him.Once when watching t.v.,he was watching t.v. with me and caught me staring at him,he looked surprised when he saw me staring at him,he disappeared.Started to get into meditation and energy's,positive and negitive,all lies.Started to send energy's to whoever and whatever,anything to get a response,dead people,sun,moon,living people,spirits,aliens,mothmen,everthing BUT GOD.Still tried to learn,taught myself sign language for three years,spanish for about three years,german for about two years,started french for a couple of months,can't remember any of it but would not give up.Started seeing demons on a regular basis,pretty much everyday,it was normal.One day I was woke up to a lady speaking to me in the natural,telling me to trust the lady I have seen,that she is always around.The lady pretended to care that I did drugs.LIE ...When I would meditate I started to ask questions,why,why,why,why was I like this hating everything,yet knowing everything was a lie,why could I not remember anything,why did I want to wear girl clothes when I was younger and couln't stand dudes,why wouldn't my body work when I knew I loved women ??? Why was I so cursed ??? Really started to see LOTS of demons now.I have seen more demons than..................Had a dream,was in a grocery store,was told to count my money,217 dollars.Walked around the corner,walked up to a door,paid my 217 dollars,went in and was in cave,place was filled with dead bodies of all the same person,in various degrees of decay.I grabbed the one that still had life in it,put it over my shoulder and walked out.Woke up.Could not figure out what the dream was about,the number was sticking to me,played the lottery did not win.Then one day it came to me,count the number of days on the calender,217 days was my birthday.Got real excited.Birthday came,I entered into a SPIRITAUL WAR UNHEARD OF.{ not sure of the order of events now,forgive me }Dreams of evil.Stuff smacking me in the natural that I could not see.Was hit so hard in a dream once that I was knocked halfway out of my bed.A black ball/demon hit me so hard in the head I was moved abou two feet.Ten voices going on at once and only I could hear them,poked,smacked,grabbed,kicked.Two of the demons were the dude I have seen and the lady who I was supposed to trust.Asked what was going on and another lady I had heard before cackcalled there is no LORD.Thought I was going crazy.Day before birthday went to bed saying JESUS if I ever see YOU I will punch YOU in the nose to running outside saying save me GOD,I can't fight these things I will give YOU everything,everything............Watching PASSION of CHRIST and a snake fell from the ceiling.Was woke up and was asked if I would be a willing vessal and PAPA GOD completely took me over and out of my mouth LOUD came I AM A VESSAL OF THE LORD !!! { Thanks PAPA,LOVE YA' } Three weeks later I was saved,I thought.How can I be saved and call JESUS LORD,if I am JESUS ??? { I am not JESUS } I prayed one day and asked who am I,my phone time changed to 1:19,I was reading JOHN.Praise GOD I am NOT JESUS,thats the day I was TRUELY SAVED and JESUS was LORD !!! Praise GOD !!! Spirirtual warfare is picking up,getting worse,was stabbed in the heart with something,would feel winescrews in my brain,twisting.Next,then I was told I was ELIJAH.Believed it,some much warfare going on my whole life I was wore out,this stuff has been going on since I was a baby,I was ready to be anbody positve.Told Pastor what was going on the voices and stuff about being ELIJAH,he agreeded and said it was GOD.I acepted it and my life exploded.The Spiritual warfare that had been going on was nothing compared to now.The worse sin { the unforgivable one }was being spoken constantly in my head,the voice that I was hearing that was quiet and still,was not GOD.My life was completely wrecked.Was told by the voice to go march with no shoes no coat on for days,standing in puddles of ice,was told to get in a ice swamp that was up to my chest { 6'2' },and march across it and stop when told.I was being toughened up because of the coming wars and needed to learn to take stuff and not complain so I did it.Was told to give all of my money to red cross,o.k.Was told to throw away my 48' flat screen t.v. away,o.k.,was told to throw away my cat because I loved my cat more than GOD,o.k. { GOD kept my cat alive,through three MAJOR snowstorms,thanks PAPA }.This went on for about a month and a half.Started to go to a prayer house for GOD,loved it.Told them I was ELIJAH,they said no you are not and told me to never come back because of the demonic activity that was going on was to much for them.I am not ELIJAH.Christians told me to go away......Asked Pastor why he agreed that I was ELIJAH and all the stuff that was going on was GOD,he said he didn't..............When I first told this Pastor that I was being raped by demons he said really,have a good sunday and went and talked about football to someone else.I was dismissed.Spiritual warfare is still going on.Go to next church.Told Pastor some of the stuff going on,two days and one night of it and he just looked at me with his mouth open and said I have a strong testamony.After our meeting I prayed for him,he did not pray for me.............????????? I no longer go there,I pray in the name of JESUS ALWAYS,can give a crap about man's law saying no.IT IS NEVER OK TO NOT PRAY IN JESUS NAME.EVER.Go to next church,place is good,they inquire of the LORD.LORD had some words for me.{ LATER }.Told Pastor some of what was going on and was told satan had a claim on my life.NO WAY,I AM SAVED AND PURIFIED BY THE BLOOD OF CHRIST.Was not helped when I reached out.Go to next church,dead,no life at all.Go to next church,better.Told Pastor some of what had happened and what was happening around the church,or at least tried,more than three times.Church was in a area/land claimed by a demon. I moved against the demon with JESUS and JESUS kicked the snot out of it.Church and land are free now.Pastor did not help.I told Pastor that I had asked PAPA GOD a BUNCH of times to kill me and he did not respond,he did email me once though about wanting to use some steaks that I had brought for a picnic for something else,but no reponse on me wanting PAPA GOD to killme.I reached out to him a bunch of times for help,no help.Interesting though,after I moved against the demon with my LORD JESUS people stated to get visions and dreams about the church growing in a mighty way.So I stopped going to that church,my Pastor has to care about me crying out to PAPA GOD to kill me more than a bunch of steaks.Have been to church one sunday in a month and not one person has called to see if I am o.k.Now I have no church,again.No Pastor,again.I am not even two years old in the LORD.I HAVE NOT BACKSLIDE SO NO WORRIES !!!!!!!!!! I LOVE MY PAPA GOD !!! The LORD has spoken through me saying," The LORD says.........." a couple of times to people.I am a Prophet.Was not me speaking.PAPA GOD has offered me the nations,said I will be rejected even more but it is not me they are rejecting but HIM.I accepted,thanks PAPA.I have lead well over 65 people to the LORD and I am told that number is in the thousands,I stopped counting at around 65.I have read the bible at least 8 times in two years.I have prayed in JESUS name a seen JESUS crush,diabetes,muscular dystrophty,mutiple scolrosis,multiple pains and headaches,and watched JESUS give people new sinus's,ears and eye's.Major healings.People who where under attack by demons no longer,prayed in JESUS name and JESUS crushed the evil,PRAISE THE LORD !!! PAPA GOD has used all of this to show me what condition the church is in,not good,not even close to the word. I FORGIVE EVERYONE AND ANYTHING OF EVERYTHING............I AM STEPPING OUT AND CAN NOT GO BACK THIS IS GOING OUT TO AT LEAST A HUNDRED PEOPLE,MY JOB,FAMILY,CONTACTS and all past Pastor's.I BENJAMIN JAMES JACKSON MAKE THE GOOD CONFESSION.I WAS A PAGEN,NOW A TRUE BELIEVER AND LOVER OF THE LORD JESUS CHRIST.IT IS UP TO PAPA GOD NOW..............TO MAKE SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL OUT OF MY LIFE.PRAISE GOD !!!!!!!!!!!!
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